Poker showdown filming experience was great! Although it was a full 14 hour filming trip.
Had alot of fun, and learned alot about poker along the way.
I came in 2nd place okay! Out of 8 girls in the poker tournament that was filmed. Haha nothing to boast about (I was just lucky) but I'm happy about it. The 20 year old me learned poker within a week just for this filming haha. Yeah, wth right, 20 and I was clueless bout poker then!

Spent the entire day at a house at Sentosa Cove. Wonderful place, wonderful view.
If I had a house like this, I'll probably scream my troubles away every night until the neighbours complain.








Cordelia.



Me! We had a bikini shoot before that, and we were supposed to pretend to splash water and have fun. lol. I had to diet and exercise for a week for this ok!




View from the balcony!



and the view from the pool which extends out to the sea.


Didnt take much pics at all for the rest of the day because every moment was like models models get ready get ready.. and everyone rushing to touch up on makeup, dress, etc.
We had to film a couple of scenes here and there and that took alot of time to finish.
I realised that a reality show actually has not much reality in it. Because most of the time, its being filmed and re-filmed again so everything is pretty much staged and planned.
So I guess even in reality shows like America's top model or the hills, some scenes you see might not be real, they were probably re-filmed till they were perfect enough for the public.



Lots of drama throughout the day though, me and Jessibella fell straight into the pond in the house! Like literally! haha, it was embarrassing but funny at the same time.
Jessi took a step backward and fell in, mine was worse, I was talkin to someone in front of me and kept walking forward without noticing the pond infront of me and fell in. I sound like a bimbo with no eyes. lol. The pond filled me right up to my chest, mind you, it was that deep. And then, our pizza orders went wrong, the light tripped, lots of NGs blah blah blah. This is what i call reality!

Well, looking forward to catch the show coming out in February 2010!

Went for steamboat dinner with Olivia and Aurick on Wednesday at YukiYaki.
Food was not bad! I would make a 2nd trip down again.









The couple cooking.



Oli and her chao-tah mushroom!



We should seriously give this black mushroom to my bf, who failed to turn up for this session which me and oli planned for at least a month ago and made me sad twice in a day! disappointment!






Oli's expression here is priceless. I just look like an old woman trying to pose for a photo.



I look like an auntie saying, "wah, its so hot here!"
Totally digging Oli's floral skirt from f21!



Finally a nice one with the good'O tiny xmas tree.



Aurick was being so funny here we couldnt stop laughing to take a proper picture.



See, this one, priceless.



Would like to dedicate the end of this post to my lovely girlfriend, whom i enjoy so much with, and thank you for being there for me when im down!!
Lovebirds for as long as we live!


Also went for dinner with Cheryl supposedly for thai dinner but the place was closed!! booohoohooo. So we settled for a jap restaurant at bugis,discussing birthday plans for our 21st! Suddenly so excited to get older.





We look like 2 smiley idiots. plus cheryl looks strangled by the scarf haha.



Yay love you plenty too babe! and we concluded that if we were to have a duo DJ gig, we shall be called.... DJ EMOFACE! Cus we're both so emo! haha.

Flying to bangkok tomorrow, finally. goodbye to S'pore!
Whoops, actually I havent packed yet.

I've been very very angsty with every little thing lately, and I think men are really insensitive and fucked up beings. They say they miss you when they're alone, when they're occupied, they ignore whatever you just said. So they use the excuse that they cant multi-task. That makes them really stupid in the first place. Then they complain that you take too long to do makeup, when they take too long to get out of the house in the first place.

They play poker all day, and think that they'll be able to make big fuck money out of it.
They complain they have no money, when they can spend a thousand bucks to maintain their stupid car.

I just watched some woman giving birth on youtube because a friend happened to post it up.
Its the water birth method, and her husband just sat there and rubbed her arm. whats the fucking use of rubbing her arm i ask you? and he just sits there. and wait, wait for the baby. he didnt even look at her pls! Why? because shes too ugly to look at without makeup?
Then i chanced upon another video of 3 guys pretending to demonstrate a birth.
Throughout the video, they kept laughing, to them giving birth is just a joke. A joke because they have the easy way out. Fuckers.

My bf's bro scolded his mum just because he was in a quarrel with his gf. Seriously, immature useless beings. I dont ever wanna give birth to a boy.

I just told him i cried watching the woman giving birth, and you know what he said?
"lol dear, im their dealer. Earn 50cents each round, not bad ah." mad fuck.

I just watched the movie 2010 with my lovely boyfriend. The movie is as lovely as he is. Nah Im kidding actually, it was horrifying! watching something that MIGHT actually come true in the future. So life is short! no point getting angry or sad! (as quoted from the bf)
Im a super emotional person, fucking pissed with myself because my brain wouldnt shut down from all the running thoughts through my head yesterday and i ended up crying my eyes out the entire night and slept only at about 6am?!

Speaking of lovely and happy things,
Baby's best friend just got married! So i finally got to wear the colorblock tube dress i bought from hervelvetvase like half a yr ago?? I rarely buy dresses from other ppl of course unless its really nice, and i particularly liked this one because theres the sweetest combi of pink!



The reception area, it was so crowded oh my. Simply because the groom is pretty sociable lol.















The wedding couple's photo. Its so nice!!




Wonder whether we'll have our turn in the future? haha.









At the dinner table. The food was pretty good! It was at some TungLok restaurant at Orchard Parade hotel. Asians should seriously come up with better names, and that is, NOT to use their own names! St James has some AH WOK restaurant outside, oh my.








With the married couple!



Changed and hopped onto St James! In conjunction with Cheryl's 20th.
We're all getting older now, rahhh!
















Cheryl always looks like shes high on drugs haha.







my pri sch mate!



A group of malay friends brought their little friend to club, i mean how nice of them! :)
Cheryl seems to be drooling in the background at something haha.




Happy 20th birthday to us both!




Also did a Calender shoot for Frolick right after my birthday.
Im excited to see the outcome! So i can use the calender for 2010 :)


This is the beginning of my explosive hair.
The theme was really loud, im supposed to have explosive hair on one side and extremely straight hair on the other. Centre parting somemore!



The dressing table. Its so bright and pretty!



Sneak peak at my makeup.





The studio.



The explosive effect!





Final look and im good to go! The makeup artistes and hairdresser and photographers were really nice, was pretty fun!



Camwhored before meeting bf, haha. Couldnt help it, love the green eyeshadow!






Wondering what i look like with cropped straight hair. Ew?



Recently got this photo of us, he's so cute here, haha!

And who says boys cant be vain?

Ta-da!


Im so excited for Poker Filming next Tues, ahh!
Am also worried that my frigging tummy will show during the photoshoot sighs :(
Why dont guys gain weight that easily?? its just so unfair. of course, am referring to the bf. that boy eats like a cow and gets nothing! I eat normal meals and have a 3 mth pregnant tummy.

Anyhows, its my first filming assignment, soo yeap looking forward to it!
Theres so much for now, bangkok next week?!

When you've been away from someone for too long, (or many even a few months might do the job)
you've lost the entire period of knowing the person better. And that period is very important For instance, 3 months of being in town cannot cover the loss of 6 months of being away. That's why long distance relationships are the hardest.
Random random thoughts, nothing is wrong baby.

My little white boy SERIOUSLY NEEDS A TAN! haha. He looks so white and awkward with a flower here its just so funny haha.












Went to double O to celebrate Jingyi's 21st!
The last time I was there, Cheryl and I managed to sneak into O bar with our Giordano colleagues when we were 17! lol.
They played R&b for about an hour woots!



Sneaking around with the birthday girl with my fav Jagerbombs!












The soon to be officially married couple. Oh my, looking at them makes me wonder how it'd be like when its my turn. Its a little scary sometimes.




Some waterfall drink that got the husband drunk! Have never tried and will never try.














First time in a club with my dearest, gosh. Thanks for piggybacking me hahaha.
this boy has 2 more yrs to go, i wonder how im gonna survive many activities without him.:(

















I'm turning 20 next week! Omg, i dont feel well about it. :(
I probably feel that I havent accomplished enough and time is running out.
But then again, we cant stay young forever!
Visited my aunt's new condo after my birthday dinner with mum and dad, the place is so peaceful! Makes me hate my house even more. Its 5.30am now and the neighbourhood is already making noise. We need some noise control over here!

MY EXAMS ARE OVER OMG, LIKE FINALLY. I'VE WAITED A THOUSAND MONTHS TO ANNOUNCE THIS MOMENT.
haha, I remember how me and earlene were so happy on Wed, we didnt know what to say to each other!

Last week was pretty torturous since I was kinda risking my accounts paper by having only 2 hours of sleep for the paper. Working for Asian Pokershowdown was cool though! All the girls were great :)




I love the dress and the pokersticker. YES YES, im the shortest :(
Because I was wearing very low heels that night ok! Heels are deceiving.



With ClaireJedrek, the host. She's really pretty!
I'm still waiting for the picture with PaulFoster. Because I was beside him! hahaha.







































My baby is back too! :D
Too bad he has to study and now its my turn to do nothing.haha.
Every time he's back i feel as if i'm living in another world, in the EAST side world. It's a refreshing change every time I step into pasir ris.




And I'm finally gonna shoot for Collection 27 tomorrow after so long. Most probably be up by Sunday, so do lookout for it!

Dad asks my maid: "eh din din, how many times you bathe in 1 day??"

Maid answers from the bathroom: "huh? I'm showering,washing my body only, im not bathing."


HAHA, i just thought it was funny.

Dilys 21st Fiesta Birthday party!! Her interesting mexican style party.






The moustache twins.

















Dilys smashing the poor horse.




Sue winning a cactus for best dressed of the night!





The woo family, so cute! Love her dad hahaha.
Happy 21st dear!


Poly mates reunion! lovelove!



Crystal jade with Oli! Miss you girlll.

Taking a break with kitty!









Not the best position of me haha, but shes so cute here!






she's so naughty now, runs around the house, bites people and wires and bites my books!




Plus the video kitty never wanted you to see!
haha kitty caught in the act.




And my sister playing with her while she sleeps. Cute nonetheless!




After a break over the weekend, i cant believe im 2 days away from my marketing exam paper! Havent been able to concentrate much :(

Plus, went for casting with Oliii yesterday and im glad it was worth it!
Gonna be working for Asian Poker showdown on Friday. :D

Which is really dangerous because the event ends at 2am and I've got a 10am Accounting paper the next day! Argh. Really hate the exams. It spoils everything man. Im seeing my boyfriend next wed! Omg, cant wait!

I'm officially obsessed haha.





Kitty slept next to my maid yesterday under the sheets like a baby!










Kitty taking a poop, literally!



Her leopard print ball.




sleeping.



sleeping! She sleeps all day!







I'm tired..




Okay just a few more head shots..







And I'm done! Told you i was obsessed!




Lover boy's coming back soooon! :D

Alright, Off i go to studyyyy!!

SAY HELLO TO KITTY!

My new boyfriend.



I'm so happy because we finally brought it home! Plus, my dad has said Yes to bangkok :D
So double happy! I even brought my sis swimming with me ytd and I got a proper tan, so triple happiness for the weekend!



It couldnt stop meowing in the car, poor cat was trying to find her countermates.
But its really sweet and fell asleep as I carried it around the house. Gets pretty attached to us after awhile.






We even bought a little pink choker for the kitty haha.


Arghh love it to bits! Thanks summer! :)

Excited because I'm gonna take a look at my first few manufactured pieces tmr!

I cant believe its already Friday, and its the 16th of October! I know, theres nothing specially significant about this date but it marks the official end of my first sem in university and I just cant believe it. I'm home on a friday night and I randomly decided to clear my livejournal inbox. And wow, cant believe how much has changed ever since i started blogging like a year plus ago? This is truly my portal of memories. 2007/2008 was wild, and pure fun and sincere. As months go by, everything just fades, the happiness, the sincerity and meaning of existence. Maybe as we get older, we indeed get lazier, and thats all it takes to waste the amount of effort taken to build up and develop a relationship. Smiles fade, we talk less, wrinkles form and we eventually grow old and die. By clearing my inbox, i cant help but read through all the past comments, livejournal entries and amuse myself with my past youth and liveliness. Something that has already disappeared after numerous failures and disappointments. I really miss those times, when relationships were so strong. Nowadays, everything is just a smile and go. Whether its sincere in the first place, is another question. So the question right now is, is it worth to give the relationships another go? Is it worth to try making up for lost time? Unsure of whether the other party would reciprocate and put in the same amount of effort? I shall try but I'm afraid of disappointment again and again. The past 3 nights have been horrid. Actually, every night has been terrible ever since I had that major quarrel with my dad and after he said those hurtful things. Every time we quarrel, all the time and effort put in to build up the closeness between us ends up like a glass of water that falls to the ground, splatters and remainds unrecovered. My body has been unwilling to accomodate to sleep. The brain just wants to get up and SCREAM at him, and confess all feelings to that damn man. Last night was pretty bad. I went to bed specially at 3am, (already so much earlier than usual) switched on my ipod,hoping to sleep within the next 15 min. But even while listening to songs to stop my thoughts from wandering, the mind just refuses to switch off! I had to literally force my head into sleeping, its like an ongoing battle between body and mind. It sounds like nothing here but its really tough if you've gone through it yourself. Its very frustrating when you know your body needs rest but you're unable to sleep and you end up suffering the next day. So I think i managed to drift off for awhile and suddenly I was jerked awake when the music on my ipod stopped. I took my earphones off thinking "oh nvm, its only 4am, I can still try to get some sleep.." I didnt want to open my eyes because the moment i do, i'm awake again. But I eventually did because I could hear sounds coming from my maid's bedroom which meant that it was time for her to get up. I opened my eyes, stared at the clock and started to curse. Seriously. It was already 6am and that meant that I probably only had 1-2 hrs of sleep because I was drifting in and out. And it doesnt help that I was rolling about in bed for 3 hrs the night before. I was so fucking frustrated with myself because I knew i couldnt sleep anymore. So yeah, i was so damn frustrated I started crying and memories of what happened the previous 2 nights came back to haunt me and that made things worse. I honestly think i'm so troubled to the extent that im harming myself. and people kept telling me i look so tired. youre damn right i am and i cant help it. I've come to realise that I've got to help myself. No use telling people how tired you are, how sad you are, because they are not you. So stop seeking consolation in others. its useless. I hope 2009 would go away quickly because its been terrible for me. I hope i'd be able to end it in happiness because it didnt start in happiness. It started with someone fainting right in front of me and I thought he was gonna die.
Anyways, since its a friday, everyone deserves to be happy, and I'll shoo and start preparing the clothes for the next collection. :)
On a sidenote, I received this text msg from my mum this afternoon.
"Esther, pls add me in your facebook. im your mother. thks." I sense some wholesome sarcasm in there. Hello mum, I hope youre reading this. If you want to know me, talk to me. Dont demand an add on facebook because i deserve the right to control my privacy. thanks.

Movie with the lovelies on Saturday! Went to catch 500 Days of Summer. Not a bad show!
Not the typical lovey dovey happy ending love story.






Bought Chewy Junior cream puffs on the way back after collecting my Anna Nucci Shoes.

Daddy said YES to the kitty! Which was after my sister started crying when he disagreed at first of course. Maybe I should involve my sister in every situation that includes persuasion, hmmm. Or maybe I should perform some crying act myself, which im sure i'd do very well at.

We tried to study! lol.

















Steamboat reunion dinner. It was all dinners dinners dinners with the boyfriend when he came back donkey weeks go. Unfortunately, I'm all alone again. For the next month at least.


I really wanna adopt a kitten! From my customer-friend. I'm really excited to bring an innocent member into the family. Probably someone or rather, something I can turn to at night and treat her like my very own. My sister's really keen about it too! But too bad for us, we've got to beg the old man and probably bribe him with money before he accepts life's little pleasures. Its another 4am teary night. Wonder how long i can stand this.

My shoe spree has begun. I just splurged $69.00(okay maybe its not so much of a splurge) on 2 pairs of platform heels from Anna Nucci.
New shoes yay! Its hard to understand but girls really cannot have ENOUGH shoes. I just get sick of them after i've worn them out for a long time. New shoes are like new clothes.

I've got my second econs test tomorrow and im still here. sighs. sometimes im pretty upset with myself. But theres one thing i definitely cannot stand, which is to repeat myself. esp to someone whom i assume know me best. you're right, i really feel that you're not how i hope you'll be like. and thats something i cannot control. oh well. you'll probably get sick of me eventually. i know it.

I wish i had the time to blog but noooo. Some things I strongly wanted to point out though.

Is anything even GENUINE anymore? Even songs have lost their meaning. tsk tsk.

I hate empty promises. I thought it was never nice to say something and never do it. or end up not doing and trying to keep mum about it. give excuses probably when you probably never even TRIED. Oh well, 2 cents worth off my head.

Happy things, I finally saw my first high destinction for my test! hahaha. omg i finally see the light in 4 years. but i cant be too happy though, exams will never be that easy.

MEGA SHOE SPREE-ING I GO!
BANGKOK HERE I COME! QUICK QUICK.

Decided to post a random picture of someone who makes me very angry yet very happy at the same time, i wanna strangle his head. hahaha.

Esther Leong just took 410 pictures and changed almost 40 times in 2 and a half hours. I'm all geared up for COLLECTION 26 Yay!

2 papers down and 1 more to go. That's all I've been going through these past 2 weeks on my own. Why does everything feel like eternity when you're alone.


When is ever enough? I dont think we'd ever be satisfied. I wish I could feel an eternal pool of satisfaction, then maybe I would feel so much better.

My dad managed to get me a partially new 2nd hand laptop. I refuse to download msn. I have every application except msn. And I'm caught up in a world of my own, where only skype and the boyfriend exists.

I've never been so excited to see Lovebird's face. And I mean the both of them.
Absence does wonders, but will it eventually lead to more troubles?

Family is redundant, especially when it gives nothing but quarrels. what if families never exist, would it get rid of obligation troubles. I think strangers have far more respect for each other. Its amazing how strangers relate

Just some random thoughts which doesnt seem to link. Gonna sleep with my marketing textbook tonight and dream of holding my lovebird the next night.


Some funny videos to spice up the post. Shit this doesnt make any sense. I've become so boring, lol!

Ah how could i forget! I was excited when I saw this video because of an interview done during the last Flea Titans flea market at Mount Sophia 2 months ago. I'm going to the next one with my boyfriend in sept yay!
I'm at 1:04! Stumbled stupidly because the interviewer said my opening line was wrong! lol.



Anyhows, its been an emotional week, dont know whats wrong with me but oh well.

There's always a first time for everything.
I was on the highway on Monday which had 2 major accidents at the same time which caused a massive jam and left me rotting in a cab for 1 hour, amounting the cab fare to $32.00. Highest price i've paid so far for an afternoon cab ride. and i wasnt even heading to changi airport or something. why oh why do i stay in jurong.
I watched a movie alone in the theatre for the first time yesterday. I was so scared i sat curled up in a ball on my own. Well, technically speaking i wasnt alone because I came with Alex but there were no more seats left becus he bought the tickets last min and we had to sit separately! But thats a first. I was watching "the orphan" and it was so good, better if i had someone to hang on to. But it was cool having my name called so many times in 2 hours becus the main character's name was esther haha.
I went sun-tanning twice in the last 2 weeks, and twice the sun disappeared on me after an hour. I seriously have no fate with the sun at all but i managed to get a tweak of color on me though.





I look like an aunty here. But at least i was under the sun.



This aunty here hiding under the shades.. lol.



I was topless. nah im kidding.




















Went to SAKAE SUSHI for our feast!!

We click click click, and ordered 10 over plates for ourselves lol.



I wanna get this mouse!














The food was soo good and it was funny because we kept ordering and ordering to make our money worth and ended up over-ordering. hahah. So we tried stuffing everything down and dang, did it keep me full for the entire night and the next morning.


Just did my hair yesterday!





Love the fringe and the color.













Collection 24 and some lady gaga videos to boot!